Inner Peace
Once upon time,there was a boy named Duncan who was during pubertas.Hewas an excellent boy with many emotions.He played the guitar and wrote songsday after day and he was so blissful.
But one day he met a girl called Vanessa.To his surprise,he found hefell in love with her!He had no idea what to do about Vanessa and he wanted towrite a song for her to express his love.But un fortunately, Vanessa justtreated him as a friend,a younger brother.Duncan thought it would be perfectand he even spent all he had to buy some flowers for Vanessa,but hefailed.Everything used to be so nice in his heart but he felt soul out of hisbody then.He was so hollow and just walking deadly in the streets of the littlecold town every single day.He could not stop thinking about the girl even justfor a second.So the gifted boy tried to lull himself by alcohol.He even hadenmities to the world when he was not sober.Still,the feelings inside were sostrong.
Duncan tried to fight,to follow his heart with full of anger.He failedhis faith and became a thug in a gang.He was falling down into the devil abyssbut emotions made him blind.However,he was sent into the prison one day.Thewithered trees and flying crows seemed to laugh at the poor boy when Duncanlooked out of the prison bus.All these were just like a dream and Duncansuddenly woke up.He just realized what he had done then and he felt soregretful.But he could do nothing to change the past,he had to be responsiblefor his savage act.He sat in the chair,waiting for the God to judge……
After two years
A boy with a face full of scars by the sword of time appeared at theprison gate.He went out and lay down on the grass.He was looking up at the bluesky,thinking over his pubertas with a smile that was brighter than the sun.
Finally,Duncanfound inner peace himself……

下面是渣渣翻译= =凑活看吧
内心的平静
从前，有个正值青春期的男孩，他的名字就叫邓肯。他是一个多愁善感的彩字。他每天与琴声作伴，谱写属于自己的青春，他多么快乐自在啊！
但有一天，他遇到了一个叫做瓦妮莎的女孩。他发现他竟然爱上了他，这让他惊慌失措。那时候他心中的感情最是丰沛。有天晚上他在梦中与瓦妮莎相会，醒来后他决定为她写一首歌来表达自己的爱慕之情。但天不如人愿，瓦妮莎只把他当做是一个朋友，或者说，一个弟弟。邓肯本以为一切将会那么完美，他甚至把辛辛苦苦攒的零花钱全花了给瓦妮莎买了一捧花，但是——以失败告终了。一切在他心中曾是那么美好，但那时候他却感觉灵魂出窍。他神情恍惚，每一天都在冰冷的小镇上，一条街一条街地如行尸走肉般游荡。脑海中那个女孩就是挥之不去，哪怕是一秒钟，他都没法不去想她。结果，这个天赋过人的男孩试图用酒精来麻痹自己的灵魂。他甚至在醉酒的时候对整个世界都充满了恨意。内心的感情仍然是如此强烈……
邓肯不断地挣扎，想要让充斥着愤怒的心去引领他向前。他迷失了信仰，竟去混帮派当马仔。他正在陷入罪恶的深渊，但心中的感情将理智击败于脚下。但无论怎样，他最终还是被送进监狱了。枯死的老树，飞过的乌鸦，邓肯向狱车窗外看去，却只看到这幅悲凉的画面。这一切就像是一场梦，而邓肯刹那间惊醒。他刚刚意识到他自己究竟做了什么，对此无比的自责。但对于过去的事他无能为力，他必须为他的暴行付出代价。他坐在狱车里，等待着上帝的制裁……
两年之后
监狱的大门口，出现了一个看上去饱经沧桑的男孩。他走了出去躺倒在草地上。他抬头看着那蓝蓝的天空，回想着自己的青春期，嘴角有一抹弧度，那微笑比太阳还要耀眼。
终于，邓肯自己找到了内心的平静……

这篇作文吧，写的比较简略，所以分数也不是特别高，只有20分（12分内容分+8分语言分）=—=...Alan老师的点评就是 More about how to find inner peace，就是让我多写点如何找到内心平静的= =

这个开篇之作吧，是把鄙人众多经历揉吧揉吧杂合在一起，综合写的这么一个作文。Alan老师说的没错，写作文要抓住重点，要扣题，整篇文章我扣的题是邓肯怎样怎样，却忘记作业的本质了= =但是Alan并不知道我在下一盘很大的棋= -=！~~没什么词汇量，大家就当笑话看着玩= =争取一周内把邓肯历险记5篇都更上来，然后会考虑接着往下写哦= -=~~~~~~~~~

召唤不？= -=唉，懒得动手...@宅久必重口 @louyuwc @mojunwei01 就你们了= -=剩下的召唤任务交给你们

哎哟不错哦

他是一个多愁善感的彩字。。。

= =手机召唤不方便

现在在新加坡？